Tired day

Had some trouble breathing today. Stupid allergies.

Hmpfhh...air is overrated anyways.

For my fellow Swedes

Ni har antagligen redan sett det här

men jag såg det först nu så jag lästa detta

och kände mig tvungen att kommentera följande:

När väljaren är mig uppfattas den svartvita bilden med den orange-blåa loggan (Under Affisher. Person.) inte alls som dokumentär eller förmedlar allvar. Den tar inte tag i mig. Jag tror inte heller detta beror på att han trots allt har en slags kostymjacka på sig. Nej jag tycker det förmedlar feghet. Det speglar exakt dokumentets budskap. Ett parti som vill gömma "människan" bakom partiet. Individuella röster ska tystas.

Jag undrar ju dessutom var alla dessa ord som inte ska användas kommer ifrån? Uppenbarligen måste de ju finnas aktivt inom partiet för att ens tas upp, så det motbevisar ju sig själv. Moderaterna uppmanar enbart till att använda andra ord för samma begrepp. Det handlar inte om att försöka driva en åsikt, utan bara om att kalla "same shit a different name". Det är falskt och påklistrat.

I've come to that age when I start to blame myself for daring to dream. Some kind of wisdom inside is telling me to not give up too early. That I will regret it whole heartedly when I mature even more and come to the realization that to at least try to reach for your dream is the only way to truly live.
Intelectual knowledge is however not the same as knowing and feeling from experience.

Was it in a cheesy tv-series, in a book or a movie where they sad the quote that made me see my reasoning in a new light? "I don't fight to win, I fight to survive".

No matter how hard it is, how impossible it seems, I'm not dreaming only of success, i have made a choice of who I am. In my attempt to grasp something deeper and more meaningful I've found my passion. Isn't that in itself a treasure to guard with my life?

It's sound to question yourself but to doubt yourself is destructive. I don't know where on the scale question your questioning is but I do know that I have to ask in order to get answers. Yet again I do not ask to get answers always, I ask questions to see different possibilities. There is no pure truth or pure untruth. There are question without answers, but all questions forces you to think.
Maybe even makes you find answers to questions you didn't think of asking.

Snow

No storm yet though. But will maybe come later. Schools are closed. The dance studio as well. I'm cuddling up inside listening to the wind that is getting stronger as I write this. A day for cookies and movies.

Snowstorm?

So I've heard it started snowing in some parts of New York now.

It's said to be a snow storm. Schools are gonna close down.

Dance classes might be cancelled. I and who was gonna dance tomorrow =(

I wonder though....if it's maybe just gonna be 5 snow flakes and a little windy.

New York is not really prepared for snow storms. Takes it by surprise every year. Every winter I've lived here, except last year, there's been some heavy snowing and yet they've never learned to deal with it. Always chocking. Everything always closes down. Kind of funny. And cozy.

Perfect night to stay in with a glass of wine.

Even superman has his kryptonite. The ones that reads the comics know. I'm superwoman and peanuts are my kryptonite. If you read my blog you know ;)

Night Words

Sitting at the balcony with a cup of homemade ginger cinnamon tea. Even though I don't think you found your way to this page yet: Thank you Gus for that recipe, always been a pick-me-up throughout the years :)
I'm so nauseous. Been ever since a week ago when I had a severe allergy reaction. Yep, one of those life threatening ones only peanuts can give you. I was lying on the cold pavement puking with my throat shutting close more and more, could hardly breath, and quickly became unable to communicate. Humbling to say the least. Both my body and mind panicking.
...Well I survived.
I'm grateful to be alive. Just bothered that my body gotten so weakened because I can't wait to make the most of the life I still have. Sitting around exhausted and nauseous is interfering with my precious time! I'm too excited.
My birthday on the 5th. Going to celebrate it, embrace it. A week ago I would probably have felt more anxious about the fact I'm getting older. Now I'm just happy about it =)

Brought some candles out here that I lit up. Made me remember my very best friend, when we were very young, we meet up somewhere outdoors in our beautiful hometown, far away from anybody else’s ears, almost always one of us had brought candles that we lit in the cold northern nights. As long as we had them our secrets were more important than freezing toes.

Today I made lattes and cappuccinos for stressed people, then a book signing at a mystery book store and gained a few bottles of fine wine. Tonight I watched a bad movie, with friends, which had its fine message and now I'm sitting here.
Exhausted since it's only the second day since the allergy reaction I've even been standing up. But I've been tired for so many days now that tiredness isn't a signal for the body to sleep anymore.
But I have the rest of the week to rest up so I'm sure it will even out.

I'll take a picture with my phone for you:

Yes I know I should probably take down the red snowflakes from the balcony but just because Christmas is over doesn't mean winter is...even though it seems like it soon is here ;)

Coffee

Learned about making coffee last night.

All drink knowledge tend to be very nerdy with silly details and insider only knowledge.

Maybe that's why it intrigues me. =)

Now I want to learn about bartending. Or actually just making drinks, to actually "tend a bar" is not the point for me. But I'm not going to be that nerdy that I call it mixology. ;)

Food knowledge seems to make more sense to me. As soon as it's liquid I have a little bit harder to grasp it, (yes, it's a bit of an ironic metaphor) but I'm guessing it's basically the same when it comes down to it.

Very interesting to learn!

Want to know moooore now!

Wind

A windy morning in Queens