To grow up...

When I was a kid, around 4-5 years old, I wanted to spell my name. With a red crayon in my hand I started to write the letters down, but since this was a new world to me I wanted to check with my mum.
So: O-F-I-A right?
My mum nicely reminded me about the S.
No, no, no I explained, I wanted to wright MY name!
O, f, i, a.
Yes but my name started with an S she explained.
After some discussion it hit me. The world as I viewed it changed forever.
I was shocked. Insulted. Offended.
My mum, my very own mum, had given me a name that started with a letter I couldn't pronounce!
My name wasn't Ofia, it was Sofia!
That's just disturbing: I had to go through life with a name I couldn't pronounce! How could my own mum be so mean??

The reason I remember this might not be the shock (even if it was tremendous...hmpfh...) but can maybe be that this occurrence slowly led to the realization that I would learn more and more and grow and get smarter and smarter. I guess this hadn't really been of importance to me before.

And during the last few years I've slowly come to another of these world revolving realizations.

When I was 4 or 5 I came to terms with that my name was Sofia, I learned to even love that S in the beginning of my name, I learned to pronounce it pretty quickly, and I also realized that I would be like my mum one day: I would grow up, I would be an adult one day, I would learn more, I would know as much as she does.

And here I am. I'm grown up. I'm an adult. I've learned a lot. But here comes the sad realization: I will never be as smart as my mum!

I kind of waited for that day to happen. But it never will! She is and will always be the smartest woman I know! Smart as a mum, as a friend and as constant proofreader and thinker.

So ever since that day as a kid when I realized my disillusion I just replaced it with another one. Huh. Kind of sucks doesn't it?